Why Do Men Cheat??...The REAL Reason(s)

This whole Tiger Woods fiasco really has me thinking....what is the real reason why men cheat? Is it because of some type of mental imbalance or is it simply because they become bored being with one woman? I know this is the million dollar question to which all women want to know the answer but this topic is very intriguing to me. Why do men cheat? Ok, so Tiger had not only one woman on the side, but he had like 10 other women!! Who does that? I mean, why get married? No, seriously. If you know you love women, why get married or get in a relationship and make someone's life miserable by cheating on her. Make no sense to me!

Now, clearly Tiger lost himself out there and the fact that he surrounded himself by such individuals as Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley doesn't say much for him. Jordan's ex-wife, Juanita, received $168 million in their divorce settlement...I'll just take a wild guess and say that it probably would've been cheaper to keep her...but that's just me. But let's forget about the money for a minute(well at least try). Why risk losing your family and jeopardizing your intergrity for a piece of ass?? I just don't get it! Can someone please explain? I was just using Tiger as an example because he was risking a lot more than the average man simply because of who he is, but let's discuss the average man. You know, the guy that goes to work everyday or "hustles" to make a living. Let's talk about him. Now, from a logical standpoint I would think that it would be much easier to be single and just date several women rather than being in a relationship or getting married and having to keep up with lies that you will be forced to tell. But there again....that's just me. However, I've talked to several men that admit to cheating and this is what they tell me...you ready for this? They love their girlfriend/wife and they know that's who they want to be with, but sometimes when it's right in front of you it's hard to say no. Huh? So, you're a grown ass man with no self-control? Oh ok. That's that bullshit! Ok, so my question still stands....why commit?? If you love that person like you say you do, why risk hurting them? I'm a woman but I can only speak for myself when I say that I would much rather a man love me and respect me enough to tell that he's just not ready to commit versus him being with me and CHEATING! Negative! The worst thing you can do is cheat on me and then tell me..."but I love you girl" Love should've brought your ass home last night...ha! I always wanted to say that! But really, how do love someone and be dishonest at the same time? How does that work? I know love and relationships can be a little tricky but damn...some things should just be common sense. Maybe I'm being naive, who knows!

I know this is a very interesting topic but I really want feedback from my brothas! Fill your girl in and let me know the real...I'm waiting! lol

Until next time....

"Relationship? Why Would He Do That?"

Are women making it too easy for men these days? I ask that question because I'm really confused. (lol) It seems like these days men don't even think about having a monogamous relationship. I'm starting to believe that they think if they view you as being the "main chick" you should be content with that. Really? When did this become ok? I'm just saying...There was a time when a relationship meant one man being with one woman. Now, you have men, and some women, that make it perfectly clear that you are number one but there are a few others on the side. Some of you may be shaking your heads right now, but you know I'm telling the truth.

Seriously, even though we say to ourselves "I would never allow a man to do me that way" or "If I can't be the only one in your life I don't want to be with you at all" can you honestly say that you've never considered being in a "fake relationship" just for the sake of being alone? Man I tell ya, when that loneliness kicks in you start having some strange thoughts. (lol) Sometimes we enter into the position of the "main chick" thinking we can change the man and persuade him into making us the only woman...WRONG! A man will not change until he's good and damn ready and if you go into it knowing what it is and what it's going to be...it's hard to turn that into a positive for you. He will forever use the famous line of "well you knew I didn't want a commitment when you started dealing with me" and of course then we have to comeback with "Yes, but I thought things would change!" Why did you think that? Have you ever heard the famous phrase "Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free" Sure you have! Well why commit when you can have all the benefits of a relationship without ever actually having to be in a relationship? Make sense now? I just don't understand how some women pride themselves in being the "main girl".....If he's dealing with both or all of them wouldn't they all be considered the "side chick"? Let me know...I can be slow at times! (lol) I can speak from experience when I say that even though in the beginning you may have an "understanding", unless you are an all out whore, which I'm sure is not the case, it is just a matter of time before that "understanding" goes completely out the door. Just be careful!

I guess what I'm trying to say to all my single ladies is this....DON"T SETTLE! You're beautiful...you're self worth is priceless and there is someone out there that will recognize that sooner or later! When they look at you and only you, they will see love and that my dear is well worth the wait!

Until next time....

The Man...The Provider Or Maybe Not...

One of my very close friends called me yesterday to ask my advice regarding an issue she has been having with her man. "Do you think I'm being irrational?" she asked. It's funny how you can always offer advice to others but you it's always a challenge to figure out your own shit.(lol) Anyway, her issue is the fact that her man has a problem helping her financially because she makes more money than him. The real problem is that this is the man that she wants to marry. Ok, some would say that she sounds like she's in it only for the money...NOOOOO! So, not the case! She has been with this guy for some years now and they have had their issues just like any other couple. This is where I'm confused....he lives at home with his parents, no bills, no REAL responsibilites...can we say SPOILED? He doesn't feel as if he should have to help her because in his mind "she has it." Ok even if she "has it" isn't part of being in a relationship knowing that the other person has your back no matter what? Do I have to be destitute for you to lend a helping hand? ijs... That's CRAZY!! She's not asking him to take care of her but they have talked about him moving into HER house that SHE bought and he still doesn't think that he should pay the amount that she proposed to him which was 800 bucks...who lives anywhere these days for less than $800/per month? Come on....what happened to the man being the provider? Wanting to take care of his family and being the head of his household even if the woman makes more money? I mean damn, what happened to Pride, Class and Dignity? I told her that I didn't think she was being irrational because he didn't even ATTEMPT to TRY to discuss what he could possibly do to help her. I mean I understand if you don't have it but to just flat out tell me NO and you rolling over every morning looking at me...HA!

I understand we live in a society now where women are VERY independent and we have no problem taking care of ourselves. Hell, I don't think I've ever asked a man to do anything for me. Well, outside of my daddy but that's different.(lol) But I think about my Mother and even my Grandmother(I miss her so much) and how they never really had to worry about anything...at least not financially. I know that there are still men out there that thrive off of "providing" for their girlfriend or wife but should we as women expect that from a man? Are we becoming TOO independent to the point where men feel as if we don't need them for ANYTHING?

I NEED FEEDBACK PEOPLE!